I guess I have to whether I want to or not

I'm fat. I knew that already.

I have been in denial though about how fat I really am.

It has taken me getting to the point where nearly no top in Canada will fit. My proportions are extremely unproportional and the top is far worse than the bottom.

I digress.

I've been in denial about how fat I really am.

I have been telling myself that I've lost weight before only to gain it all back plus, so why bother?

I have been telling myself that the effort doesn't equal the reward in the long run.

I have been telling myself that as long as my health isn't adversely affected, then don't worry about it.

I got the DVD of Chicago a few months ago - maybe, June? Don't really remember now. I played it through to the first sighting of Mama...basically the big song. I shut it off. Horrified by what I saw and haven't turned it back on since.

I have been having dental problems. For a few months now. I went yesterday for a general cleaning and check up. I have an infection where the broken molar is. I wasn't surprised, but she was. I also have an infection in the gum on the other side around a tooth that has the filling buckling. She said that if I am brushing & flossing regularly (which I am) that this other infection shouldn't be happening. Well, it is. Looking things up on the internet, apparently obese people have a higher amount of infections of the mouth than normal sized people and that in a lot of cases, the infection leads to tooth loss.

Not cool for a singer.

I also have approximately 7 concerts that I will be performing in between September 15 & January 1.

Finsing cute outfits has been a challenge.

Seeing what I looked like last year at this time was a challenge.

My teeth are a challenge.

My blood pressure is a challenge.

I weighed myself today. It's going to be a challenge, but one I've got to take a real good look at tackling again as now my health is being affected.

Boo. I'm lazy and don't want to bother with this whole excercise crap. But, if I don't I will not be able to sing and loose valuable income. Income I coudl use to buy cuter outfits to sing in. What a vicious circle!