And so, the panic begins

It is only March. Well, not quite even...it's February 27th to be exact and I am already starting to panic.

I am starting to panic about how we are going to pay bills over the summer. A music teacher doesn't work from June through to September, but we still have bills to pay for those 3 months. The same amount of bills, plus more as it is nicer weather and generally, you spend more on "treats" (ice creams, pizzas when it's too hot to cook, etc) and you spend more on fuel as you feel like travelling...driving more...which then when you get to your place to spend the sunny day away, you spend money not necessarily budgeted for.

*le sigh*

I always had a difficult time with the summer drought when I taught "full-time" previously. When I decided to go back to teaching this time, things were different...I had a husband who was making really good money at a full time job and he had medical benefits through his work.

Needless to say, things change and we are not in the same place as we were when the decision was made to teach and things are going to be much more difficult than I ever imagined this year and I am already panicking.

I am trying to come up with new sources of temporary income without much expenditure. I have a potential lead on 2 weeks worth of work, but I am uncertain how much the pay would be or even if I will get the job.

I would like to think that the cruise ships will work, but the reality of last year is that it wasn't worth the time I sat at the table. So, that really isn't a viable option this year. I will have a few students in the summer, but that won't add up to $50 per week.

Readings are sporadic and again, not viable when looking at mortgage, car payment, phone, etc.

I used to be a good bartender, but that was when I was 15 years younger and 80lbs lighter. Not too many bars are going to hire an older, oversized waitress or bartender.

I really don't want to get back in to call center work, but I will take what I can get when I'm looking at things. Shoppers is usually hiring, so that may work over a temporary period of time.

I am going to have to take some time to figure out what I really want to do. I'm happy enough teaching when I'm teaching, but is it worth the anxieties that come with the down time? I don't want to quit after only giving it 1 year back to a serious try, but...

I don't want to grow up anymore.