I've had some time off - not as much as I first planned for or anticipated, but some time off just the same. I think I would have ended up with that time off whether it had been the holidays or not as once again, I ended up sick. Time off = time sick for me, which really is starting to piss me off.
Oh well.
Haven't gotten half the "crafties" done that I had wanted to get done either, but oh well. I got a new crafties idea from the yule party I went to at a friend's house and the biggest yankee swap action generator was this colourful bag which had a plastic bag of tea inside, but everyone had the same idea and wanted it for the same reason - as a tarot bag! So, I went to the second hand shop the first day out of the house after that and realized that I could re-cycle tank tops into colourful and fun tarot bags and have finished two and am on the third bag tonight. Whoohoo!!! Don't know if anyone would actually buy them or not, but I hope so!!! I'm hand-sewing them and I'm not the best sewer, but I think they will do nicely!
I didn't do any xmas cards this year, but I do have some new years cards that I hope to send out to some people with an example of my crafties in them!
I also have to pack Bonnie's gifts in a box and ship it to Hfx. I was kinda of hoping I'd get down there between xmas and New Years, but being sick took that right out of the question - as did the weather!! We've had 7 storms this month and another one on the way tomorrow and we had 6 storms TOTAL last year according to the guy across the street who plows. BAH!
Xmas itself was great! I got a few surprises, mostly from Van with the big gift being a night away at a local inn with the room being the King Suite with Jacuzzi tub and a hot stone massage. SOOOOOOO nice!!! I have wanted to try a hot stone massage for soooo long now!! We had the overnight last night there and it was truly wonderful! Even though we didn't have to "travel" to go there, it did feel like a world away. I loved the tub - Van didn't so much. I enjoyed the massage, but don't think I'd get another one soon...I just really like my regular masseuse and her deep tissue massage. Mind you, the hot stones were VERY nice, it's not something to pay that much for regularly. :)
Most, if not all of Van's gifts were surprises to him from me, which was cool. Most of it I got Black Friday shopping, so it was a bit difficult for me to keep them secrets, but I did ! Yay me!!!
I think we have to do some furniture buying soon too - for a DVD rack/holder/bookcase thingie to hold all the new DVD's we got! :)
I think that covers things from here. I'm at work at the moment. I have done about an hour and a half of work - Van's on his 5th hour. I should be doing more, but figured I'd stop and write, since I'm technically on vacation.
I think I will be talking to Laurie this week to see if she is willing to put up on her website my tarot bags and bells for sale...I may just wait and stock up though and grab a table at the Sunday morning Craft sale...I'll have to see how things progress.
May 2008 be the best year yet for all of you folks reading this that I know and don't know!!!
Blessings to you and yours!
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Monday, December 24, 2007
Friday, December 21, 2007
It wasn't my Friday
Nope, it wasn't my friday. I'm still at work. Oh well.
Really upset with my mom re: grandfather. I think sister and I are going to have to have an intervention.
I'll keep you posted.
Really upset with my mom re: grandfather. I think sister and I are going to have to have an intervention.
I'll keep you posted.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
My friday?!
It's not suppossed to be my friday on Thusday this week, but then again, I was suppossed to get two half-days this week, btu with a surprise/emergency project for one of the sponsor teams, that came first, so I am contemplating taking tomorrow off after all. We'll have to wait and see how much work I get done today.
Pretty tired today - no real good reason for it. Went to bed at a decent and fairly early time and also stayed asleep for most of the night as well.
Hating the weather (still). Just hoping that the weather will hold out so that Judy and I can drive to Hfx for Bonnie's baby show on Jan 13th. I'll be terribly disappointed if I can't get there for it! Perhaps if the weather is expected to be bad, I'll take the bus and take Monday off...we'll have to wait and see.
Worried a bit about Bonnie - she just let me know that she got rear-ended yesterday at a red-light, but that the baby was quite active so things seem okay. I've got my fingers crossed for her that the accident doesn't trigger early labour. Her sis-in law is a week overdue, so it would be rather amusing if they have the boys at the same time.
We have company at the house the next couple of days...James and Doug are in town for a visit before they head back to Alberta and Ontario respectively. It amazes me that they want to visit with us so much that they are willing to take a couple of days away from their short time with their own family to come and visit us. This is the first time that they've been here while we're working, so we'll see how that goes later today. We'll see if they can find their way around town by bus as Doug didn't drive home.
I've got one student coming through the holidays for accompanist help, which I will be paid handsomly for, mind you, so that's fine, but as always, I like the money, but I don't like taking the time.
I think I will take some money and join the delta health club while I'm on vacation to try to re-set myself and my body when I have time to focus on it. I'm up to 250lbs and just feeling like crap. I don't really have the money, but I don't really have the health to spare either.
Oh yeah! Hit a bus in the storm on Friday and lost my side-mirror on the passenger side, so perhaps I should be spending the money on that, but...ah well.
Pretty tired today - no real good reason for it. Went to bed at a decent and fairly early time and also stayed asleep for most of the night as well.
Hating the weather (still). Just hoping that the weather will hold out so that Judy and I can drive to Hfx for Bonnie's baby show on Jan 13th. I'll be terribly disappointed if I can't get there for it! Perhaps if the weather is expected to be bad, I'll take the bus and take Monday off...we'll have to wait and see.
Worried a bit about Bonnie - she just let me know that she got rear-ended yesterday at a red-light, but that the baby was quite active so things seem okay. I've got my fingers crossed for her that the accident doesn't trigger early labour. Her sis-in law is a week overdue, so it would be rather amusing if they have the boys at the same time.
We have company at the house the next couple of days...James and Doug are in town for a visit before they head back to Alberta and Ontario respectively. It amazes me that they want to visit with us so much that they are willing to take a couple of days away from their short time with their own family to come and visit us. This is the first time that they've been here while we're working, so we'll see how that goes later today. We'll see if they can find their way around town by bus as Doug didn't drive home.
I've got one student coming through the holidays for accompanist help, which I will be paid handsomly for, mind you, so that's fine, but as always, I like the money, but I don't like taking the time.
I think I will take some money and join the delta health club while I'm on vacation to try to re-set myself and my body when I have time to focus on it. I'm up to 250lbs and just feeling like crap. I don't really have the money, but I don't really have the health to spare either.
Oh yeah! Hit a bus in the storm on Friday and lost my side-mirror on the passenger side, so perhaps I should be spending the money on that, but...ah well.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
crafting and creative
So, i've totally hit a creative bug the past couple of weeks...I've been making presents for xmas and I've got everything wrapped except for stocking stuffers and then I arranged a xmas duet for Claire and I and I can see me getting more in to that.
I've got 11 days off coming up...I have a couple of things in mind that I want to make for gifting for all the babies that are coming up in the 2008 and I think I might actually start the teaching music book that I've been threatening to put together...we'll see how much creative energy I actually have once I get some time off!!! :0
I've got 11 days off coming up...I have a couple of things in mind that I want to make for gifting for all the babies that are coming up in the 2008 and I think I might actually start the teaching music book that I've been threatening to put together...we'll see how much creative energy I actually have once I get some time off!!! :0
messy!
It's messy out there - 20cm of snow, now it's at least 10cm of freezing rain! and wind is gusting up to 100km/hour. we'll be lucky to keep power tonight! BAH!
At least I shovelled out the car so it won't be sooo heavy in the morning after it all turns to rain.
either way...I think I'll take the bus so this time I won't run into it! :)
At least I shovelled out the car so it won't be sooo heavy in the morning after it all turns to rain.
either way...I think I'll take the bus so this time I won't run into it! :)
Thursday, December 13, 2007
It's once again my Friday
So, it is once again my Friday, even though it's Thursday.
Tomorrow I have to get the peanut butter balls made for the Christmas exchange at work as well as for the normal Christmas home made gifts givings.
I also need to finish up my spirit boxes that I will be giving at Yule to 3 of my "circle".
I then need to start and finish the xmas and new year cards that I am sending out to everyone and get them in the mail.
I also need to vaccuum, clean the bathroom and do laundry.
*Whew*!! I'm exhausted now and I haven't even started yet!! Isn't it sad when you need to take a vacation day from work just to get work done at home?!
Tomorrow I have to get the peanut butter balls made for the Christmas exchange at work as well as for the normal Christmas home made gifts givings.
I also need to finish up my spirit boxes that I will be giving at Yule to 3 of my "circle".
I then need to start and finish the xmas and new year cards that I am sending out to everyone and get them in the mail.
I also need to vaccuum, clean the bathroom and do laundry.
*Whew*!! I'm exhausted now and I haven't even started yet!! Isn't it sad when you need to take a vacation day from work just to get work done at home?!
Thursday, December 06, 2007
my Friday
Today is my Friday...I'm taking tomorrow off so I can go to a Physio appt for 8am at the hospital, then have an OB/GYN appt to get "fixed" at 11:30am, play and sing for a family requested funeral at 2:15pm then go to the Imperial to see a student take part in the Childrens Interactive Theatre's production of the sound of music with mom at 7:30pm.
I think I'll need a day off from my day off! :)
Speaking of days off...I'm going to get 11 days off straight from Sat. Dec 22nd to Jan 2nd with only having to take 4 vacation days!!! WOOT!!!
I think that I'll make the next two weeks short weeks by taking a day off each week as well...maybe get caught up on the wrapping/baking/making thing!
here's hoping!
I think I'll need a day off from my day off! :)
Speaking of days off...I'm going to get 11 days off straight from Sat. Dec 22nd to Jan 2nd with only having to take 4 vacation days!!! WOOT!!!
I think that I'll make the next two weeks short weeks by taking a day off each week as well...maybe get caught up on the wrapping/baking/making thing!
here's hoping!
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Business opportunity
I need to make some cash - under the table.
On the weekend in that half and half state of sleep I had the memory of a spirit bell that I had bought at a craft sale maybe 15 years ago in Hfx.
I went out to Michaels two nights ago, spent $50 of supplies and went home and in 2 hours made 12 of them!!! And, I personally think they look AWESOME!!! :)
I will give these away as xmas gifts but I think that I will look in to making and selling them as a side venture for cash. Not sure if anyone will actually like them other than me and (hopefully) my weirdo friends, but I can only try.
This also may be the opportunity I've been looking for to get in to the stones field as well. Only time will tell.
Not much by way of craft sales now. Kinda sucks that I thoguht of it only after the craft shows are done for xmas and there really isn't that much of a craft show thing going on until the spring, but perhaps that just gives me the time to plan out my wares and get stocked up!
Either way, I'm excited to get the initial reactions when they are given out for xmas!
On the weekend in that half and half state of sleep I had the memory of a spirit bell that I had bought at a craft sale maybe 15 years ago in Hfx.
I went out to Michaels two nights ago, spent $50 of supplies and went home and in 2 hours made 12 of them!!! And, I personally think they look AWESOME!!! :)
I will give these away as xmas gifts but I think that I will look in to making and selling them as a side venture for cash. Not sure if anyone will actually like them other than me and (hopefully) my weirdo friends, but I can only try.
This also may be the opportunity I've been looking for to get in to the stones field as well. Only time will tell.
Not much by way of craft sales now. Kinda sucks that I thoguht of it only after the craft shows are done for xmas and there really isn't that much of a craft show thing going on until the spring, but perhaps that just gives me the time to plan out my wares and get stocked up!
Either way, I'm excited to get the initial reactions when they are given out for xmas!
Another Concert Down
So, another concert completed last night - the big one for the community choir that I accompany and my boss at work directs. Way too much togetherness, but it's a surprise paying gig.
Anyway, they wanted some soloists to intersperse with the choir pieces and I was asked if I would sing a solo. Seeing as I just started working with them in October and i dont' want to step on toes right away (no one else has their degree in music) I figured no sense coming out guns a blazing, so I offered to do a duet with the director instead of a solo.
She and I can't be more opposite in our styles of singing and taste in music, so I took two fairly well-known xmas pieces that were total opposites (Amen and Angels we have heard on high) and combined them in to a duet less than 2 weeks from the concert
It's hard arranging a piece for accapella vocals because you can't hear both of the parts at the same time. The first time she heard it she thought it was "cute". Then the second time around she didn't like it and I had to agree on some of her points and I went back and re-wrote parts of it.
We both liked it much better. Even she admitted that she had the easy part and mine was rather complicated, which was fuel for her fodder when I made a mistake.
Anyhoos, we did it last night and I thought it was great! i held back on my volume as she has a fairly light voice and I thought we blended well.
There was a little girl, maybe 5 or 6 there who exclaimed out loud after we were done that she liked the piano better. I laughed and said I like the piano better too and then the director/my boss comes back with - I like her piano playing better too! *meow*
I was kinda taken aback by that. What was nice was as I was exiting the church I had 2 people come up to me and say that they thought my singing was awesome :)
Lessened the sting a bit!
Ah well, I'll hit them good if they ask me to sing in the spring concert heheh.
Anyway, they wanted some soloists to intersperse with the choir pieces and I was asked if I would sing a solo. Seeing as I just started working with them in October and i dont' want to step on toes right away (no one else has their degree in music) I figured no sense coming out guns a blazing, so I offered to do a duet with the director instead of a solo.
She and I can't be more opposite in our styles of singing and taste in music, so I took two fairly well-known xmas pieces that were total opposites (Amen and Angels we have heard on high) and combined them in to a duet less than 2 weeks from the concert
It's hard arranging a piece for accapella vocals because you can't hear both of the parts at the same time. The first time she heard it she thought it was "cute". Then the second time around she didn't like it and I had to agree on some of her points and I went back and re-wrote parts of it.
We both liked it much better. Even she admitted that she had the easy part and mine was rather complicated, which was fuel for her fodder when I made a mistake.
Anyhoos, we did it last night and I thought it was great! i held back on my volume as she has a fairly light voice and I thought we blended well.
There was a little girl, maybe 5 or 6 there who exclaimed out loud after we were done that she liked the piano better. I laughed and said I like the piano better too and then the director/my boss comes back with - I like her piano playing better too! *meow*
I was kinda taken aback by that. What was nice was as I was exiting the church I had 2 people come up to me and say that they thought my singing was awesome :)
Lessened the sting a bit!
Ah well, I'll hit them good if they ask me to sing in the spring concert heheh.
Tired of the snow - already!!!
Yes, one major snowfall and I'm tired of the snow already!
I hate shovelling to start with, so 20+ cm of wet, heavy snow doesn't entice me to enjoy it. That and shovelling with an obnoxious, ignorant neighbour makes it doubly difficult.
I actually called in my dad to finish the driveway and he half-buried their truck. Just made it difficult for them to get down off the mini-mountain he stuffed under their Ford Escape.
While I admonished dad for doing it, I smiled inside :)
I hate shovelling to start with, so 20+ cm of wet, heavy snow doesn't entice me to enjoy it. That and shovelling with an obnoxious, ignorant neighbour makes it doubly difficult.
I actually called in my dad to finish the driveway and he half-buried their truck. Just made it difficult for them to get down off the mini-mountain he stuffed under their Ford Escape.
While I admonished dad for doing it, I smiled inside :)
Friday, November 30, 2007
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
so tired
drove to F'ton last night for a 3 hour course and drove home again starting at 9:30pm in the hail and rain. :( Miserable drive and I'm sooo tired today.
BAH!
On the bright side, we have another new project!!! January is going to be GREAT!
BAH!
On the bright side, we have another new project!!! January is going to be GREAT!
Monday, November 26, 2007
OZZY, ZAKK & ZOMBIE?!?!?!
OMG!!! Ozzy, Zombie (and I hope) Zakk are scheduled to come to Moncton on Jan 24th and Hfx Jan 26th!!! Mind you, the tix are $100 each, so that's a bit steep, but WOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!
Happy birthday to me!!!
TIX on sale Dec 1!!! YEAH!!!
Now, I just have to get Van to say yes!! :)
Happy birthday to me!!!
TIX on sale Dec 1!!! YEAH!!!
Now, I just have to get Van to say yes!! :)
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Long time, no blog
WOW! John was right - it HAS been a long time since I last blogged.
Lots of happenings, just not a lot of desire to write about them as most of it I don't have a lot of good things to say and I didn't want this to be a "piss & moan" blog.
Way back in September, I helped put together (basically put it all together) a "tea and tarot" fundraiser for campus radio. It was a much better success than I ever expected - since we had only sold 6 tickets before the doors opened, and I was actually thinking of cancelling it, ANYTHING had to be a better success than that, and it was! We sold all but 4 tickets in the end and I truly beleive every who came was glad they did!
I helped me on a great many levels and really re-confirmed a few things that had been niggling at me, so I'm glad in the end it happened.
I would love to do one again - maybe in February to break up the "winter blahs", but we'll have to see - we definitely needed more readers...we were suppossed to have 4 readers, but only 3 showed up. The next time I would expand it to a "Divination and Desserts" and have multiple types of readings available.
They hired a new ops manager at work. On so many levels I 'm conflicted, but mainly happy that they have. I can concentrate on 10 things instead of 20 things and I am no longer the immediate superior of my husband. Hopefully that will make things better for the both of us and the company as a whole because people were not going the proper channels if there were issues and that rather pissed me off.
I agreed to accompanying a 100 voice choir for a sepcial concert held Nov. 19th - a fundraiser for Alzheimers. At first I agreed to just the choir music, then it expanded to all groups and soloists, then it was pared back again to just the choir and one group - suited me ust fine as it was the most amount of performing I had done in about 5 years. While I didn't really enjoy the 6 week committment, I did enjoy the performance itself - my first on the Imperial Theatre's stage here in SJ. a Great instrument!
I also agreed to playing for the community choir that one of the owners directs because she had tried 6 other people already and none of them worked out well. I know most of the people in the choir, so that's cool, but I do think we spend entirely too much time together in and out of work! :P
I took Thursday and Friday off last week and went to the states Black Friday shopping - my first time...very cool...would do it again in a heartbeat, but I would only do the first part off the day and not go back out again, no matter what any of the others wanted to do. Good deals and lots of Christmas presents were bought!
I even bought the coolest baby onsie - a Black Label Society onesie for Baby Sweet!!! teeheehee While I know it's bad luck, I coudln't help myself - I've never seen it in Canada, and it was just too me and Rocker-baby to pass up!
I still am going to accupuncture and physio and getting progression in dregrees still - measured 35 degrees Nov. 2 at Physio, so we're still making a few more degrees - YAAY!
I have to make some extra money - lots of bills now to pay and on salary, you can't make extra, so, I'm thinking of new ways to make some cash under the table to help out the finances...I"ll keep you posted.
Well, that about brings us up to date. I'll try to be better at writing here as I do think it helps. We no longer have access at work to facebook, but they haven't taken access away to blogspot yet, so I think this may be a nice way to let loose every now and then when I need a brain break :)
Hope everyone is getting in the holiday spirit!
Lots of happenings, just not a lot of desire to write about them as most of it I don't have a lot of good things to say and I didn't want this to be a "piss & moan" blog.
Way back in September, I helped put together (basically put it all together) a "tea and tarot" fundraiser for campus radio. It was a much better success than I ever expected - since we had only sold 6 tickets before the doors opened, and I was actually thinking of cancelling it, ANYTHING had to be a better success than that, and it was! We sold all but 4 tickets in the end and I truly beleive every who came was glad they did!
I helped me on a great many levels and really re-confirmed a few things that had been niggling at me, so I'm glad in the end it happened.
I would love to do one again - maybe in February to break up the "winter blahs", but we'll have to see - we definitely needed more readers...we were suppossed to have 4 readers, but only 3 showed up. The next time I would expand it to a "Divination and Desserts" and have multiple types of readings available.
They hired a new ops manager at work. On so many levels I 'm conflicted, but mainly happy that they have. I can concentrate on 10 things instead of 20 things and I am no longer the immediate superior of my husband. Hopefully that will make things better for the both of us and the company as a whole because people were not going the proper channels if there were issues and that rather pissed me off.
I agreed to accompanying a 100 voice choir for a sepcial concert held Nov. 19th - a fundraiser for Alzheimers. At first I agreed to just the choir music, then it expanded to all groups and soloists, then it was pared back again to just the choir and one group - suited me ust fine as it was the most amount of performing I had done in about 5 years. While I didn't really enjoy the 6 week committment, I did enjoy the performance itself - my first on the Imperial Theatre's stage here in SJ. a Great instrument!
I also agreed to playing for the community choir that one of the owners directs because she had tried 6 other people already and none of them worked out well. I know most of the people in the choir, so that's cool, but I do think we spend entirely too much time together in and out of work! :P
I took Thursday and Friday off last week and went to the states Black Friday shopping - my first time...very cool...would do it again in a heartbeat, but I would only do the first part off the day and not go back out again, no matter what any of the others wanted to do. Good deals and lots of Christmas presents were bought!
I even bought the coolest baby onsie - a Black Label Society onesie for Baby Sweet!!! teeheehee While I know it's bad luck, I coudln't help myself - I've never seen it in Canada, and it was just too me and Rocker-baby to pass up!
I still am going to accupuncture and physio and getting progression in dregrees still - measured 35 degrees Nov. 2 at Physio, so we're still making a few more degrees - YAAY!
I have to make some extra money - lots of bills now to pay and on salary, you can't make extra, so, I'm thinking of new ways to make some cash under the table to help out the finances...I"ll keep you posted.
Well, that about brings us up to date. I'll try to be better at writing here as I do think it helps. We no longer have access at work to facebook, but they haven't taken access away to blogspot yet, so I think this may be a nice way to let loose every now and then when I need a brain break :)
Hope everyone is getting in the holiday spirit!
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Uninspired
I sooooo don't want to go in to work tomorrow. It's a combination of wanting to go to the lake and be with my family who are all on vacation and just hating work. I really am soooo tired and frustrated with work, it's simply not worth it.
My blood pressure is incredibly high even after my doctor made some medicine changes. I think it's to do with work to be honest, which I've never said before...
I really think I have to sit down, write out the things that I want from work...i.e. take something off my plate - either the operations or the project management, because I'm not happy doing both - too much to do, and in particular, the operations are just my growing pain with everyone and everything.
So...perhaps that is what I'll do while I sleep tonight...compose a letter to the owners to explain to them why they have to shit or get off the pot.
My blood pressure is incredibly high even after my doctor made some medicine changes. I think it's to do with work to be honest, which I've never said before...
I really think I have to sit down, write out the things that I want from work...i.e. take something off my plate - either the operations or the project management, because I'm not happy doing both - too much to do, and in particular, the operations are just my growing pain with everyone and everything.
So...perhaps that is what I'll do while I sleep tonight...compose a letter to the owners to explain to them why they have to shit or get off the pot.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
hateful
I am a very hateful person. I have been on medication for a few months now and I don't find I'm any less hateful...I just find I am more in the "don't care"mode.
I still find I'm hatefilled...Van will attest to that, but that I am now to the point where I don't care that I am, I don't care that I'm not, I don't care if I do something, I don't care if I don't do something, that I just don't care.
I actually didn't want to get up today and go to work. I hate going to work so much that I'd rather avoid. So, I guess in that respect I do care because I don't want to go. And it's not because I don't like the work...for the most part I really love the work, there are just certian things about work that are just too much to bear.
Since being "re-assigned" (i.e. demoted) I've been demoted in all respects except for the workload and responsibilities! That's really not fair. They can't afford to hire someone else to be the operations manager, they told everyone that I was basically no longer the ops manager, yet they are still expecting me to do everything at least project and documentation wise and cleaning up shit wise of the operations manager.
I'm no longer on the operations floor, but yet, they expect me to know what's going on. and when I say I don't know, they are confused as to why.
When I am pro-active on something operations wise and present it to them, it's not what they wanted, it's not the way they would have done it, etc., etc., etc. and then tell me that they don't know what they want, but that's not it and try again.
Fuck you!
They bring in a sales manager, tell him that I'm project manager, not ops manager, but then when all hell breaks loose between vacatins and illness and I have to step up to ensure that the business keeps running operationally, he doesn't understand why it's me he is now having to deal with as I'm only "acting" as manager and he doesn't have to "report back to me". Yes indeed, it's been easy at work to say the least.
Then they wonder why I'm on nerve and mental medication!! Kinda easy when you stop and look at all the responsibilities I still have when I shouldn't, without any real ability to do them or power to oversee them and the people here.
The floor no longer sees me as their manager, because I'm no longer there with them, watching them constantly, knowing what's going on.
The management no longer sees me as the manager, because they re-assigned me, but didn't re-assign the work.
I no longer see me as the manager, because they told me I'm not, yet I'm still doing the work so that the place doesn't fall apart, but the hate and resentment that has been building up and consuming me is getting difficult to contain.
Today, in the midst of a crying spell, one of the owners said to me that the two owners actually discussed last week how unfair this is to me, but that they don't know of a way around it and that once again, they didn't realize the difficult position they put me in until somethign bad happens and it's then too late.
While i'd like to say here that I don't care, I can say that I do care about this and I do care that there is nothing they can do about it because it's at my expense.
I sooooo need a break. Everyone else but Van and I have taken vacation and enjoyed the summer. I didn't feel like I coudl take a break so soon after going on sick leave for 5 weeks, but now we're looking down the barrell of a loaded gun with 5 projects all seemingly gearing up to start at the same time, which means for us it's hiring and training time and on top of that, for me it's project programming, testing, and management. This is on top of all the other reports, processes, documentation needs, payroll, etc., etc., etc. that I have been responsible for.
They pay me well, but it's still not enough.
I'm truly hateful. i should be thankful to have a job - one that allows me luxuries and some freedoms, but I am not. hate filled, resentment filled...that's what I am and I honestly don't care about that.
I still find I'm hatefilled...Van will attest to that, but that I am now to the point where I don't care that I am, I don't care that I'm not, I don't care if I do something, I don't care if I don't do something, that I just don't care.
I actually didn't want to get up today and go to work. I hate going to work so much that I'd rather avoid. So, I guess in that respect I do care because I don't want to go. And it's not because I don't like the work...for the most part I really love the work, there are just certian things about work that are just too much to bear.
Since being "re-assigned" (i.e. demoted) I've been demoted in all respects except for the workload and responsibilities! That's really not fair. They can't afford to hire someone else to be the operations manager, they told everyone that I was basically no longer the ops manager, yet they are still expecting me to do everything at least project and documentation wise and cleaning up shit wise of the operations manager.
I'm no longer on the operations floor, but yet, they expect me to know what's going on. and when I say I don't know, they are confused as to why.
When I am pro-active on something operations wise and present it to them, it's not what they wanted, it's not the way they would have done it, etc., etc., etc. and then tell me that they don't know what they want, but that's not it and try again.
Fuck you!
They bring in a sales manager, tell him that I'm project manager, not ops manager, but then when all hell breaks loose between vacatins and illness and I have to step up to ensure that the business keeps running operationally, he doesn't understand why it's me he is now having to deal with as I'm only "acting" as manager and he doesn't have to "report back to me". Yes indeed, it's been easy at work to say the least.
Then they wonder why I'm on nerve and mental medication!! Kinda easy when you stop and look at all the responsibilities I still have when I shouldn't, without any real ability to do them or power to oversee them and the people here.
The floor no longer sees me as their manager, because I'm no longer there with them, watching them constantly, knowing what's going on.
The management no longer sees me as the manager, because they re-assigned me, but didn't re-assign the work.
I no longer see me as the manager, because they told me I'm not, yet I'm still doing the work so that the place doesn't fall apart, but the hate and resentment that has been building up and consuming me is getting difficult to contain.
Today, in the midst of a crying spell, one of the owners said to me that the two owners actually discussed last week how unfair this is to me, but that they don't know of a way around it and that once again, they didn't realize the difficult position they put me in until somethign bad happens and it's then too late.
While i'd like to say here that I don't care, I can say that I do care about this and I do care that there is nothing they can do about it because it's at my expense.
I sooooo need a break. Everyone else but Van and I have taken vacation and enjoyed the summer. I didn't feel like I coudl take a break so soon after going on sick leave for 5 weeks, but now we're looking down the barrell of a loaded gun with 5 projects all seemingly gearing up to start at the same time, which means for us it's hiring and training time and on top of that, for me it's project programming, testing, and management. This is on top of all the other reports, processes, documentation needs, payroll, etc., etc., etc. that I have been responsible for.
They pay me well, but it's still not enough.
I'm truly hateful. i should be thankful to have a job - one that allows me luxuries and some freedoms, but I am not. hate filled, resentment filled...that's what I am and I honestly don't care about that.
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Been Awhile!
Wow! Sure has been a while since my last update.
Things here are rolling along as always...fast! Seems like summer has just started and yet, August 15th is next week! ACK!!! August 15th is when summer ends in New Brunswick...always...Ganky has always said summer is June 15th to August 15th here and he's never been wrong yet. *le sigh*
So, computer issues are (hopefully) behind us as Van got me a new HP laptop with all the goodies for a really good price!
Just finished the taxes though, so it appears that that will be the last thing we buy in a long time.
I'm thinking that I'm just going to give the lawyer the tax info and tell him that I want 10 times the money my passenger got, so that would be $120,000. Seems fair. hopefully they'll go for it. Over course, minus his 25% commission...means I don't get 6 figures take home... but it'd be enough to pay off the taxes, pay off the car and pay off the credit card and start fresh again. I was hoping for enough to buy a house and/or a franchise of some sort, but ah well...working girl I will always be :)
So, really nothing more to say here...just trying to stay even keeled...I'm finding it hard to stay up, but that's just somethign to keep working on all the time.
Have a great sunny day where ever you are!
Things here are rolling along as always...fast! Seems like summer has just started and yet, August 15th is next week! ACK!!! August 15th is when summer ends in New Brunswick...always...Ganky has always said summer is June 15th to August 15th here and he's never been wrong yet. *le sigh*
So, computer issues are (hopefully) behind us as Van got me a new HP laptop with all the goodies for a really good price!
Just finished the taxes though, so it appears that that will be the last thing we buy in a long time.
I'm thinking that I'm just going to give the lawyer the tax info and tell him that I want 10 times the money my passenger got, so that would be $120,000. Seems fair. hopefully they'll go for it. Over course, minus his 25% commission...means I don't get 6 figures take home... but it'd be enough to pay off the taxes, pay off the car and pay off the credit card and start fresh again. I was hoping for enough to buy a house and/or a franchise of some sort, but ah well...working girl I will always be :)
So, really nothing more to say here...just trying to stay even keeled...I'm finding it hard to stay up, but that's just somethign to keep working on all the time.
Have a great sunny day where ever you are!
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Weird Dream
I had the weirdest dream last night/this morning. While I know that I cna't usually trust my dreams when I'm sick, this one struck a real chord.
I dreamt that I was doing a piano exam! It was a piano exam, but through a university/college with a building that I've never been in...it was HUGE!!! three floors...marble floors...spiral stiarcase and the exam was done on a full stage at a full-sized grand piano with a jury like they have for University! However, I hadn't practiced. I also owed the prof an essay, which I didn't do. I was out in the snow, in a car garage with a makeshift light, practicing on an out of tune rickety old upright pieces that I hadn't practiced in about 3 months, so I drilled a few of the sections that I knew I had difficulties with previously and then had to go through this tunnel through to the hallway where I had to wait with others taking their exam.
My exam was delayed, and I was so upset because I had to drive back to SJ in the storm and it would be too late to do so safely, but we (I dont' know who the we were) couldn't afford to stay an overnight.
Then it was my turn, I walked on stage, turned to the jury and told them outright that I hadn't practiced, I hadn't done any of the essays or homework assigned because I have been going through a terrible depression and lost focus, function and co-ordination, but if they'd allow me to come back in another few months, that'd be ideal, but that I would play for them, but I wouldn't be pleasant to listen to.
I have no idea what the verdict was...I either woke up or the dream simply stopped.
Odd. I haven't done an exam or jury in over 10 years! Weird the things that run through the subconscious mind!
I dreamt that I was doing a piano exam! It was a piano exam, but through a university/college with a building that I've never been in...it was HUGE!!! three floors...marble floors...spiral stiarcase and the exam was done on a full stage at a full-sized grand piano with a jury like they have for University! However, I hadn't practiced. I also owed the prof an essay, which I didn't do. I was out in the snow, in a car garage with a makeshift light, practicing on an out of tune rickety old upright pieces that I hadn't practiced in about 3 months, so I drilled a few of the sections that I knew I had difficulties with previously and then had to go through this tunnel through to the hallway where I had to wait with others taking their exam.
My exam was delayed, and I was so upset because I had to drive back to SJ in the storm and it would be too late to do so safely, but we (I dont' know who the we were) couldn't afford to stay an overnight.
Then it was my turn, I walked on stage, turned to the jury and told them outright that I hadn't practiced, I hadn't done any of the essays or homework assigned because I have been going through a terrible depression and lost focus, function and co-ordination, but if they'd allow me to come back in another few months, that'd be ideal, but that I would play for them, but I wouldn't be pleasant to listen to.
I have no idea what the verdict was...I either woke up or the dream simply stopped.
Odd. I haven't done an exam or jury in over 10 years! Weird the things that run through the subconscious mind!
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Holiday Weekends are never long enough!
It's so true! Holiday weekends are never long enough! I'm still exhausted!!
I've got to get to bed early tonight as I've got physio at 8am in the morning!! UGH!
We had a BBQ a day on the long weekend - Sat. a work BBQ which was actually a nice time, Sun. BBQ at a friend's house which was again a nice time. The first baby of the group was there - he's quite sweet, but giving him back when I wanted to eat was nice! :) Monday we went to the lake for ... a BBQ!!! :) All three days were sun and rain...always rain when it was time to BBQ. typical. Ah well!
I have a sore throat today. I'm hoping it doesn't turn into a full-fledged cold! :( I hate summer time colds the most.
Other than that, not much happening. Just trying to stay sane. :)
I've got to get to bed early tonight as I've got physio at 8am in the morning!! UGH!
We had a BBQ a day on the long weekend - Sat. a work BBQ which was actually a nice time, Sun. BBQ at a friend's house which was again a nice time. The first baby of the group was there - he's quite sweet, but giving him back when I wanted to eat was nice! :) Monday we went to the lake for ... a BBQ!!! :) All three days were sun and rain...always rain when it was time to BBQ. typical. Ah well!
I have a sore throat today. I'm hoping it doesn't turn into a full-fledged cold! :( I hate summer time colds the most.
Other than that, not much happening. Just trying to stay sane. :)
Friday, June 29, 2007
Focus
I am having a very difficult time focusing as of late. It's not really getting better either. It doesn't seem to be sleep related either :( Anyone have any time for helping to focus?
Monday, June 25, 2007
RIP
Deepest sympathy to the families left behind of Chris Benoit, his wife Nancy (Woman) and their son Daniel. Yet another one of the boys lost too soon. :(
Monday, June 18, 2007
3.5 days of sun
Wow! What a great weekend that has just passed! Not only was it our third sunny weekend in a row, but I had an extended weekend, as I took Thursday and Friday off and Bonnie was around to boot!
Bonnie & Randy came up on Wednesday afternoon and Stayed Wed & Thurs. night at Rockwood campgroud. Then Friday we headed to the lake where we stayed Fri & sta night. We all packed up and headed out on Sunday before lunchtime. They were heading to parts unknown for a couple more days. What more can one ask for in life but a couple of days of sitting on the wharf at the lake, feet (or whole body) in the water, soaking up the sun doing squat all?!? :) It was also the first time in 3 years that I've stayed overnight at the lake and Van's first time ever. It was okay...not great. He didn't hardly sleep, but mom & dad's bed was a little wonky. Mom worked, so it was just us, though Matthew did come down and stay Saturday night. I think he was a bit more than disappointed at how boring we really are! Van wasn't overly struck by anything or anyone, and that's okay. Things have changed in general, so I can see it. Perhaps just time and spacial issues, but I don't really think so. We'll see. I am more tired though than I expected I would be.
Thursday night was another Tea & Tarot. Basically all new people to practice on. Bonnie did billets, though she found it too distracting to be in the thick of everything, so she headed to the basement. Shakti found it too distracting to be in the larger group to work with the crystal ball, so she went to the back bedroom. Ann and I were left to the the cards. I think it went well. People seemed to be happy with the readings that they got. The full meal deal is on hold until we get a suitable venue and more readers to be involved.
I'm not sure how things are going to go down, but I'm hoping that it all turns out for the best in the long run. Some interesting reactions to say the least.
Van took me to the movies last night after Father's Day supper at Judy's. We saw Surf's Up. very cute! The babies are ADORABLE!!! Recommend to anyone looking for a bit of a brain halt. :) Tonight we are going to go see Ocean's 13. We don't see a movie in the theatre for about 6 months, then 2 in a row! Leave it to us! :)
Bonnie & Randy came up on Wednesday afternoon and Stayed Wed & Thurs. night at Rockwood campgroud. Then Friday we headed to the lake where we stayed Fri & sta night. We all packed up and headed out on Sunday before lunchtime. They were heading to parts unknown for a couple more days. What more can one ask for in life but a couple of days of sitting on the wharf at the lake, feet (or whole body) in the water, soaking up the sun doing squat all?!? :) It was also the first time in 3 years that I've stayed overnight at the lake and Van's first time ever. It was okay...not great. He didn't hardly sleep, but mom & dad's bed was a little wonky. Mom worked, so it was just us, though Matthew did come down and stay Saturday night. I think he was a bit more than disappointed at how boring we really are! Van wasn't overly struck by anything or anyone, and that's okay. Things have changed in general, so I can see it. Perhaps just time and spacial issues, but I don't really think so. We'll see. I am more tired though than I expected I would be.
Thursday night was another Tea & Tarot. Basically all new people to practice on. Bonnie did billets, though she found it too distracting to be in the thick of everything, so she headed to the basement. Shakti found it too distracting to be in the larger group to work with the crystal ball, so she went to the back bedroom. Ann and I were left to the the cards. I think it went well. People seemed to be happy with the readings that they got. The full meal deal is on hold until we get a suitable venue and more readers to be involved.
I'm not sure how things are going to go down, but I'm hoping that it all turns out for the best in the long run. Some interesting reactions to say the least.
Van took me to the movies last night after Father's Day supper at Judy's. We saw Surf's Up. very cute! The babies are ADORABLE!!! Recommend to anyone looking for a bit of a brain halt. :) Tonight we are going to go see Ocean's 13. We don't see a movie in the theatre for about 6 months, then 2 in a row! Leave it to us! :)
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Cleansing
Had a cleansing therapy session today. Not what was expected of this session, however, one that was needed. He took the emotional things that I can't logistically relate to and made it logical. So, I'm hoping that that will make me deal more easily with these feelings that don't make sense to me, but I can't stop feeling them.
Bonnie & Randy are coming in to town tomorrow. They are bringing their travel trailer and 2 dogs, stays Weds and Thurs night at Rockwood Park Campground, Friday we'll head to the lake where they'll park the trailer in the yard and we'll stay there for Friday and Saturday night. Van has to work Friday day, but I'll swing up and get him after work on friday and we'll stay friday night and Saturday night at the lake. mom is working, so the folks won't be there, but Ganky probably will. Sunday morning I have to leave for church (unless Barry is better and takes the service) and we'll all head back to SJ on Sunday evening. They may stay another couple of nights at Rockwood, or they may head to moncton where they will camp for the next week so she can visit one of her brothers who is working in Moncton.
So, I'm hoping that the weekend will be a nice, relaxing, cleansing time of sitting doing nothing on the wharf at the lake! :)
Bonnie & Randy are coming in to town tomorrow. They are bringing their travel trailer and 2 dogs, stays Weds and Thurs night at Rockwood Park Campground, Friday we'll head to the lake where they'll park the trailer in the yard and we'll stay there for Friday and Saturday night. Van has to work Friday day, but I'll swing up and get him after work on friday and we'll stay friday night and Saturday night at the lake. mom is working, so the folks won't be there, but Ganky probably will. Sunday morning I have to leave for church (unless Barry is better and takes the service) and we'll all head back to SJ on Sunday evening. They may stay another couple of nights at Rockwood, or they may head to moncton where they will camp for the next week so she can visit one of her brothers who is working in Moncton.
So, I'm hoping that the weekend will be a nice, relaxing, cleansing time of sitting doing nothing on the wharf at the lake! :)
Monday, June 11, 2007
Potato, Potato
You say Poe-Tay-toe, I say Poe-Tah-Toe. It's all the same thing, but it's all in how you want to say it. You say re-assignment, I say demotion. It's all the same thing, but it's all in how you want to say it.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Change
So, the change has been decided. The timeline has not. Change for everything and all. A step back and a step down. Good thing? Bad thing? Only time will tell and no timeline means no telling.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Mish Mash
Ever get that deep seated tired to the core? What did you do to combat it? (Don't bother responding if you would suggest exercise.)
Had another emotional meeting at/with regards to work yesterday and today. Another complete breakdown at both. Is it worth it? Haven't decided yet.
They presented me another option today. A way to stay, but a completely different place and level. Is it out of a sense of loyalty for all that I've done with them so far? Probably. Do I want to stay here? Probably. I've asked for an outline of what they believe will be needed for this new position. I'm just not sure that there is a way to save anything within though. I will give them credit for trying so hard to keep me here, and happy...at their own expense. Damn friendships first!
Seriously considering truly going "public" with my Spiritual side and thoughts. I let anyone and everyone who actually asks me what I think about religion of all kinds, but I'm seriously looking at some SSF development classes and iiihs certifications. Then again, it's all organized, which is probably the thing I dislike the most about it!! :) Oh well. Life isn't perfect. but perhaps I can take what I like from it and then modify as needed. What I've been doing anyway. But, I think that would feed the counselling and teaching void that I feel right now. It will also mean investing money and time, which I'm not convinced is necessary, but perhaps it is to be taken seriously? Don't know. Doubt that anyone will truly take me seriously anyway with it all, but hey! All I can do is try. That's what life's all about.
It's Camp Day at Tim's today...So I got 24 Smile Cookies for the office. Sharing rawks!
When I was at the lake on Sunday both Van and I opened up to my mom about a lot of things along the other worldly line and she didn't balk, blink or ridicule. Way to go mom!!! Baby steps are great! :)
I'm confused as to why I have no self-esteem even when I know I'm good enough at something. Anyone have any thoughts on combatting that? Even Cognitive Behavioral Therapy just doesn't seem to be cutting it.
Life is hard enough, why is it that other people always seem to make it harder?
How are Van and I going to agree on where to live when we both want the same thing, just in different places? He wants NS and I want either St. George or Hampton/Sussex.
Solstice is coming. I've been invited to another ritual. So far all the rituals I've been invited to have been at times I've had previous committments. This one isn't, but I'm still not keen on going. Why? Not sure. Perhaps it's they're too "out there" for me? They think they are Pagan/non-Christian, when really they are just rebellious and goth interested. *le sigh*
Solstice - a blurb as written in the Llewellyn's Witches Datebook 2007:
The longest day and shortest night of the year. Solstice marks the height of the Sun's powers and the beginning of their decline as the wheel of the year turns. Celebrations are filled with marriages, music, dancing, racing, feasting and rituals. Young animals and new babies have replenished the community. This is a joyous time of renewal.
Stonehenge was aligned to the Summer Solstice Sun about 4,000 years ago. Each year, thousands of modern Pagans and Witches gather at Stonehenge in celebration of the Summer Solstice. Many other stone works are aligned to the Summer Solstice, attesting to teh widespread importance of this day in cultures around the world.
Summer Solstice is sacred to the Horse Goddess Epona. She is a Mother Goddess of the fruits of the fields and orchards and represents abundance; the cornucopia is a symbol of Epona's bounty.
A time of renewal. Perhaps that is applicable to me afterall.
Had another emotional meeting at/with regards to work yesterday and today. Another complete breakdown at both. Is it worth it? Haven't decided yet.
They presented me another option today. A way to stay, but a completely different place and level. Is it out of a sense of loyalty for all that I've done with them so far? Probably. Do I want to stay here? Probably. I've asked for an outline of what they believe will be needed for this new position. I'm just not sure that there is a way to save anything within though. I will give them credit for trying so hard to keep me here, and happy...at their own expense. Damn friendships first!
Seriously considering truly going "public" with my Spiritual side and thoughts. I let anyone and everyone who actually asks me what I think about religion of all kinds, but I'm seriously looking at some SSF development classes and iiihs certifications. Then again, it's all organized, which is probably the thing I dislike the most about it!! :) Oh well. Life isn't perfect. but perhaps I can take what I like from it and then modify as needed. What I've been doing anyway. But, I think that would feed the counselling and teaching void that I feel right now. It will also mean investing money and time, which I'm not convinced is necessary, but perhaps it is to be taken seriously? Don't know. Doubt that anyone will truly take me seriously anyway with it all, but hey! All I can do is try. That's what life's all about.
It's Camp Day at Tim's today...So I got 24 Smile Cookies for the office. Sharing rawks!
When I was at the lake on Sunday both Van and I opened up to my mom about a lot of things along the other worldly line and she didn't balk, blink or ridicule. Way to go mom!!! Baby steps are great! :)
I'm confused as to why I have no self-esteem even when I know I'm good enough at something. Anyone have any thoughts on combatting that? Even Cognitive Behavioral Therapy just doesn't seem to be cutting it.
Life is hard enough, why is it that other people always seem to make it harder?
How are Van and I going to agree on where to live when we both want the same thing, just in different places? He wants NS and I want either St. George or Hampton/Sussex.
Solstice is coming. I've been invited to another ritual. So far all the rituals I've been invited to have been at times I've had previous committments. This one isn't, but I'm still not keen on going. Why? Not sure. Perhaps it's they're too "out there" for me? They think they are Pagan/non-Christian, when really they are just rebellious and goth interested. *le sigh*
Solstice - a blurb as written in the Llewellyn's Witches Datebook 2007:
The longest day and shortest night of the year. Solstice marks the height of the Sun's powers and the beginning of their decline as the wheel of the year turns. Celebrations are filled with marriages, music, dancing, racing, feasting and rituals. Young animals and new babies have replenished the community. This is a joyous time of renewal.
Stonehenge was aligned to the Summer Solstice Sun about 4,000 years ago. Each year, thousands of modern Pagans and Witches gather at Stonehenge in celebration of the Summer Solstice. Many other stone works are aligned to the Summer Solstice, attesting to teh widespread importance of this day in cultures around the world.
Summer Solstice is sacred to the Horse Goddess Epona. She is a Mother Goddess of the fruits of the fields and orchards and represents abundance; the cornucopia is a symbol of Epona's bounty.
A time of renewal. Perhaps that is applicable to me afterall.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Job?
I think the time is fast approaching when I must change direction (yet again). This is not going well being back and I don't see how it will get any better, so what do I have to look forward to?
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Tea & Tarot to go public?
Tea & Tarot went so well at my place last week that I think we can expand it and do a public tea & tarot. Only problem is that one of the readers at my place doesn't think she is ready to do a public outinig so to speak. She is uncomfortable with the idea of reading for anyone who may be there. I can understand that, however, we can't work 40 to 60 people with 2 readers.
When I asked the other reader if she knew of anyone else who could read, she said no, that none of those that she has been working with are at the level they need to be to read publically. I can understand that as well.
Also, the date that I picked, Thursday, June 28th won't work as I have tickets to Charlie Pride that night. So, I'm thinking that it's not meant to be at this time...too soon perhaps? Not sure.
I've got at least 2 groups of people though who are interested in coming to the house for readings for 4 or 5 people. Haven't talked about price yet. I think I'd do $15 per person at the house to start. Then again, just more experience is good too, even if just for free practice.
I'll see. Maybe July is the better time after all. Maybe some of the students in the other reader's class will be ready to publically read in another month's time. I think now it's just too rushed.
When I asked the other reader if she knew of anyone else who could read, she said no, that none of those that she has been working with are at the level they need to be to read publically. I can understand that as well.
Also, the date that I picked, Thursday, June 28th won't work as I have tickets to Charlie Pride that night. So, I'm thinking that it's not meant to be at this time...too soon perhaps? Not sure.
I've got at least 2 groups of people though who are interested in coming to the house for readings for 4 or 5 people. Haven't talked about price yet. I think I'd do $15 per person at the house to start. Then again, just more experience is good too, even if just for free practice.
I'll see. Maybe July is the better time after all. Maybe some of the students in the other reader's class will be ready to publically read in another month's time. I think now it's just too rushed.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Dreams
How do you dream? Do you dream? Do you dream in colour or in black and white? Do you dream in fragments or in a whole? Do you wake up from a dream and go back to sleep and pick up where you left off? Do you control where your dreams take you or do you have dreams that flow freely? Do you dream literally or figurtively? Do your dreams come true?
I have learned that my dreams are very literal. To the point where the dreams are so literal I miss it. This week's dreams are not missable.
Bugs...actually, a worm-like creature that bored it's way under my skin. At the start of the dream it was visable underneath the skin..long and black...slightly fragmented on the right arm, but one solid line on the left. Same place on both arms - upper arms where most people get their tattoos. These worms when they got under the skin needed to be surgically removed, but by the time I got the hospital's emergency room, they didn't think that it was an emergency and they made me wait. The longer I waited, the further down under the skin this worm went. I tried picking it out myself. I took a needle or a pin like thing and tried to slice the skin enough to get at it, but it literally just came out in pieces, like pepper and the fragments would mostly stay in and it was still intact for the most part. So, I couldn't get it out myself, and no one would help me. Mom sat with me the entire time we waited. The waiting room turned in to a lounge chair and table at the side of a pool. by the time I had gotten to see a doctor, my body had integrated the bugs.
now that's literal.
Then, the other night after the awards dinner, I dreamt that I was the "Big Show" (yes, the wrestler) and that was exactly what I was that night on all levels, in all facets and meanings of that to all people I came in contact with...a big show and I knew that I was good at putting on the big show...I always was. Luckily for me in this dream, the Big Show won his match :)
I have learned that my dreams are very literal. To the point where the dreams are so literal I miss it. This week's dreams are not missable.
Bugs...actually, a worm-like creature that bored it's way under my skin. At the start of the dream it was visable underneath the skin..long and black...slightly fragmented on the right arm, but one solid line on the left. Same place on both arms - upper arms where most people get their tattoos. These worms when they got under the skin needed to be surgically removed, but by the time I got the hospital's emergency room, they didn't think that it was an emergency and they made me wait. The longer I waited, the further down under the skin this worm went. I tried picking it out myself. I took a needle or a pin like thing and tried to slice the skin enough to get at it, but it literally just came out in pieces, like pepper and the fragments would mostly stay in and it was still intact for the most part. So, I couldn't get it out myself, and no one would help me. Mom sat with me the entire time we waited. The waiting room turned in to a lounge chair and table at the side of a pool. by the time I had gotten to see a doctor, my body had integrated the bugs.
now that's literal.
Then, the other night after the awards dinner, I dreamt that I was the "Big Show" (yes, the wrestler) and that was exactly what I was that night on all levels, in all facets and meanings of that to all people I came in contact with...a big show and I knew that I was good at putting on the big show...I always was. Luckily for me in this dream, the Big Show won his match :)
tired
I know that when a person isn't happy, they become increasingly tired to their core. I know that when a person isn't happy, they become increasing ill and their symptoms reflect their unhappiness in their illness. I know that sometimes you can be happy and still be sick and tired. I'm just not sure where all this lies right now within and without.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Tea & Tarot/Desserts & Divination
So, I've decided to have a tea & tarot/desserts & divination night here at the house for a few people (maybe 10 or 12) next week on Tuesday night and see how it works, kind of a mini test to see how it just might work if I did want to take it to a larger scale.
I've been thinking about putting together a tea & tarot even at the arts center...turn it into a cafe with tables and chairs and tea and desserts and have more than just me go around to each table and do readings. It would be a fund raiser, but I'm not sure that any entity...me, friends, family or Saint John is really ready for this yet. So, this will be a test the waters type thing.
I'm quite excited. Mom is coming. She's been wanting her cards read for a long time now, so it'll be interesting to see her when she sits around with Shakti for a while. I've invited one from work and his wife and I'm not sure about either of them either. So, it kind of is my test of how the world will look at this type of event.
The Tarot master is also coming with her Tarot master mother, so that is intimidating, but I'm hoping it will just bring out the best in me. We'll see. I have to get lots of sleep and drink nly water from today on out. I really only get to see clearly when I'm somewhat detoxified.
Now, I just have to plan the menu :) Hello M&M's!!! :)
I've been thinking about putting together a tea & tarot even at the arts center...turn it into a cafe with tables and chairs and tea and desserts and have more than just me go around to each table and do readings. It would be a fund raiser, but I'm not sure that any entity...me, friends, family or Saint John is really ready for this yet. So, this will be a test the waters type thing.
I'm quite excited. Mom is coming. She's been wanting her cards read for a long time now, so it'll be interesting to see her when she sits around with Shakti for a while. I've invited one from work and his wife and I'm not sure about either of them either. So, it kind of is my test of how the world will look at this type of event.
The Tarot master is also coming with her Tarot master mother, so that is intimidating, but I'm hoping it will just bring out the best in me. We'll see. I have to get lots of sleep and drink nly water from today on out. I really only get to see clearly when I'm somewhat detoxified.
Now, I just have to plan the menu :) Hello M&M's!!! :)
Monday, May 21, 2007
Time Flies
Whoo! Time flies when you're having fun...or even when you're not! :)
Had another Tarot Group meeting. Loving getting in there and working more indepth with the cards. My preferred deck is truly an "artistic deck", which does make things a bit more difficult to grab things from, so I do have to know them more and better and go more with the gut than another deck, but that's my choice too.
Today is Van's birthday. He's working and none too happy with me about that since I'm not, but it's time and a half seeing as this is a stat holiday in Canada.
We just got back from a weekend getaway to various parts of Nova Scotia and we did the rounds of all of the spiritual stores along the way. Got some presents myself along the way including...
A Cherry Quartz Point, two slate pentacle coasters - one regular, one celtic in design, a hanging swarosky crystal, 2 night fairies and a moon with hanging star, sun and pink tiger eye ball. :) :) :) My hubby spoils me terribly...he got the handing crystal, the standing fairy and the moon for me!! And it was HIS birthday!! hehehe I tried uploading some pics, but blogger is being a pain.
He even bought me a mystic fire topaz ring!!! He was going to give it to me for our anniversary, but coudn't wait that long. *awww* such a thoughtful, sweet man! And not just because he thinks of the materialistic things for me! :)
I am hoping to put more energy back in to this soon. I'm starting to put more energy back in to my spirit, and this in turn does help keep me on track! :)
Had another Tarot Group meeting. Loving getting in there and working more indepth with the cards. My preferred deck is truly an "artistic deck", which does make things a bit more difficult to grab things from, so I do have to know them more and better and go more with the gut than another deck, but that's my choice too.
Today is Van's birthday. He's working and none too happy with me about that since I'm not, but it's time and a half seeing as this is a stat holiday in Canada.
We just got back from a weekend getaway to various parts of Nova Scotia and we did the rounds of all of the spiritual stores along the way. Got some presents myself along the way including...
A Cherry Quartz Point, two slate pentacle coasters - one regular, one celtic in design, a hanging swarosky crystal, 2 night fairies and a moon with hanging star, sun and pink tiger eye ball. :) :) :) My hubby spoils me terribly...he got the handing crystal, the standing fairy and the moon for me!! And it was HIS birthday!! hehehe I tried uploading some pics, but blogger is being a pain.
He even bought me a mystic fire topaz ring!!! He was going to give it to me for our anniversary, but coudn't wait that long. *awww* such a thoughtful, sweet man! And not just because he thinks of the materialistic things for me! :)
I am hoping to put more energy back in to this soon. I'm starting to put more energy back in to my spirit, and this in turn does help keep me on track! :)
Sunday, April 15, 2007
A Good Afternoon
I had a good afternoon this afternoon. Got invited and actually went (key words there) to a Tarot Group. It was a bit different than what I expected...it was a combination of a class for learning and practicing and with different people, but all very interested...truly interested in Tarot.
The hostess is a very nice lady. One I had met years ago, but had not had much interaction with. Makes me wish I had more earlier. Oh well. A couple of people there that I wouldn't have expected to be there that I know through alternate means that I don't think they expected me to be around anything like that either. Quite entertaining.
I got a reading. I asked "What do I need to do to continue on a happy path?" of course, I got caught a bit because I didn't specify work, family, spiritual, health path, etc...but we went with the spiritual path. It was a good set of cards. They did 3 card spread of past, present, future and I got a bit caught off guard when the future is "move", but then as we all started to discuss, it made perfect sense.
I have been talking for a while about making a move in a different direction with things of the spirit, including readings. That's why today was such a good thing for me to go to. I realized that I wasn't that knowledgable (the teacher is incredibly gifted), however, I also learned that I am quite far along with my knowledge, use, intellect, thought and instincts on the cards. Perhaps the billets are helping more than I thought they could with the other divinations as well.
But, with the move, I believe I can see a way for me to move in a new direction. I got a really good sense between this gathering and the other gathering that was held a few months ago about which way I need to go. I feel a very strong pull in two ways, but one in particular, that I really don't understand, but I will take some time to research more.
I'm looking forward to enjoying the quest again!
The hostess is a very nice lady. One I had met years ago, but had not had much interaction with. Makes me wish I had more earlier. Oh well. A couple of people there that I wouldn't have expected to be there that I know through alternate means that I don't think they expected me to be around anything like that either. Quite entertaining.
I got a reading. I asked "What do I need to do to continue on a happy path?" of course, I got caught a bit because I didn't specify work, family, spiritual, health path, etc...but we went with the spiritual path. It was a good set of cards. They did 3 card spread of past, present, future and I got a bit caught off guard when the future is "move", but then as we all started to discuss, it made perfect sense.
I have been talking for a while about making a move in a different direction with things of the spirit, including readings. That's why today was such a good thing for me to go to. I realized that I wasn't that knowledgable (the teacher is incredibly gifted), however, I also learned that I am quite far along with my knowledge, use, intellect, thought and instincts on the cards. Perhaps the billets are helping more than I thought they could with the other divinations as well.
But, with the move, I believe I can see a way for me to move in a new direction. I got a really good sense between this gathering and the other gathering that was held a few months ago about which way I need to go. I feel a very strong pull in two ways, but one in particular, that I really don't understand, but I will take some time to research more.
I'm looking forward to enjoying the quest again!
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Ostara
I missed posting this on the actual day, but, better late than never, right? :)
Ostara is a time of fertility and sacred balance between night and day. Ostara begins the process when stored energy bursts forth in to fruition. Feasting depends on the remaining stores of the last season's harvest, so it is not as abundant as some other sabbats. The focus of Ostara is renewal, expansion and the returns of the Sun's life-giving warmth.
Early flower, eggs and rabbits are al symbols of Ostara. The ancient custom of coloring and hiding eggs and rabbit symbolism both remain popular today. It is a time of celebration as the light tips the balance and overtakes night, lenthens the days and brings antiipation of the return to the growing time.
Herbs are planted and the chores of making the soil ready for the coming planting time are begun at Ostara. houses and lands are cleared of the winter's refuse, repairs are made, and spring cleaning is thorough and complete. This is a time of new beginnings and possibilities. new ventures are begun, new relationships are formed and the life forces of the earth begin to awaken. Ostara is a time of deep gratitude.
by Abby Willowroot, as poublished in Llewellyn's Witches' Datebook 2007.
I guess that means I had better get to cleaning the house really well, not just cleaning it at all! :)
Ostara is a time of fertility and sacred balance between night and day. Ostara begins the process when stored energy bursts forth in to fruition. Feasting depends on the remaining stores of the last season's harvest, so it is not as abundant as some other sabbats. The focus of Ostara is renewal, expansion and the returns of the Sun's life-giving warmth.
Early flower, eggs and rabbits are al symbols of Ostara. The ancient custom of coloring and hiding eggs and rabbit symbolism both remain popular today. It is a time of celebration as the light tips the balance and overtakes night, lenthens the days and brings antiipation of the return to the growing time.
Herbs are planted and the chores of making the soil ready for the coming planting time are begun at Ostara. houses and lands are cleared of the winter's refuse, repairs are made, and spring cleaning is thorough and complete. This is a time of new beginnings and possibilities. new ventures are begun, new relationships are formed and the life forces of the earth begin to awaken. Ostara is a time of deep gratitude.
by Abby Willowroot, as poublished in Llewellyn's Witches' Datebook 2007.
I guess that means I had better get to cleaning the house really well, not just cleaning it at all! :)
Monday, March 26, 2007
Tired and Frustrated
Why is it there is no rest for the weary? I'm not even wicked. Just Weary.
I'm doing some research on Bi-Polar Disorder. Interesting findings.
I did a few billets on Saturday upon request and didn't come close to the person who was doing the requesting, but I think it may be something close for others.
I have to get together with the ladies soon. We're all in various states of need. :(
I understand that another friend in Germany ended up in hospital due to High Blood Pressure. I have just been through a rash of tests for mine as it is way out of control :( But, I haven't landed in the hospital yet...work may put me there yet, but not quite yet :)
Was hoping to have M&J over for dinner before he heads back to SoCal, but it doesn't appear to be a possibility with work being what it is. :(
I want to do the same for C&P too, but that's highly unlikely and I hate to mix business with pleasure because it never turns out well in the end. :(
Oh well. Have to take risks...right?
I'm doing some research on Bi-Polar Disorder. Interesting findings.
I did a few billets on Saturday upon request and didn't come close to the person who was doing the requesting, but I think it may be something close for others.
I have to get together with the ladies soon. We're all in various states of need. :(
I understand that another friend in Germany ended up in hospital due to High Blood Pressure. I have just been through a rash of tests for mine as it is way out of control :( But, I haven't landed in the hospital yet...work may put me there yet, but not quite yet :)
Was hoping to have M&J over for dinner before he heads back to SoCal, but it doesn't appear to be a possibility with work being what it is. :(
I want to do the same for C&P too, but that's highly unlikely and I hate to mix business with pleasure because it never turns out well in the end. :(
Oh well. Have to take risks...right?
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Water
A water logged basement just caps off a glorious day from hell. At least my father has a wet/dry vac that is now in my basement and taking a break from sucking up an inch of water.
Sometimes it feels like I just can't get ahead.
Sometimes it feels like I just can't get ahead.
Monday, March 12, 2007
Getting there
Still tired, and my voice is still raspy and soft, I'm getting better. I feel better. I just need to stay on the eating better. That will help the energy level.
I've got a light night of teaching on the back end of March Break, but I have to teach tomorrow night full up as well :(
I've got a dr's appt. Thursday morning that I have forgotten to tell work about. :( I've got to remember to ask him for a massage script.
My student is here, so I'll be back later.
I've got a light night of teaching on the back end of March Break, but I have to teach tomorrow night full up as well :(
I've got a dr's appt. Thursday morning that I have forgotten to tell work about. :( I've got to remember to ask him for a massage script.
My student is here, so I'll be back later.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
My Mother
Is too funny...they are bored at work, so teh boys set her up on the internet at ebay and she called to ask me how to buy soemthing. Instead of me trying to talk her through setting up and account (never mind the fact that she doesn't like putting her credit card on the internet for anything) I told her to just get me the item #'s (no small task) and I'd order them for her and she can pay me back! At elast it was something small (Italian charms) once we did that, she's now looking at the rings (I don't have the money in the bank to cover those!) EEK! She's already an ebay addict!!! heheh
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Still no voice
Many are rejoicing at the fact that I still have no voice! I went back to the hospital yesterday because I was feeling that much more wretched, but apparently there wasn't any more they could do. In fact he thinks it's viral and that the medicine I have won't help, so we'll see.
At least I got 2 hours straight sleep before waking up due to coughing fits, so I must be getting better! :)
New neighbours moving in to one of the apartments next door. They're really loud moving in and they don't look...healthy...if you know what I mean? But, we'll see. So far it's only a bed from a trailer on the back of a beat up blue and black van. Can't judge a book by it's cover, right?
So, with regards to the previous post, I'm a hater not a lover, I ahve been going through a period of time where I hate just about everything and anything. It's ironic since we're getting more help at work (they've hired on more leads and another Supervisor), the work is expanding (we're renovating the upstairs of the building and hoping to move upstairs by the end of March), I got a raise (which simply puts me in another tax bracket - I don't see any more money) and in most people's eyes all is good and yet, I find I hate everything...I hate my job, I hate the building, I hate the fact that we're renovating (lots of noise and interruptions to our current calls and customers) I hate the fact that while I'm making more money than I ever have, I'm farther behind in the money department, and I have no idea why since the bills aren't any different than before! I hate the weather, I hate the shovelling, I hate this town, I hate my body, I hate my weight, I hate my car (especially in the snow). It feels like basically the only thing that I don't seem to hate right now is my husband (which is a good thing!)
I'd love to get away for a trip, but I've got committments that I can't get out of (playing for a student for her university music auditions) and no money, no ability to get any money either. It's my own fault (didn't pay the taxman on time, so payments throughout the year kind of drag you down) so I have no one to blame for my misery other than myself, but it just seems that I will never see lighter time, fun times or happy times again. I don't feel like I can spend money on anything more than the necessaities and movies or travel is way too much of a luxury to even contemplate, but I am afraid that if this continues for what it appears it will continu for (a significant amount of time - probably more than another year) I will go insane. Ah well. That's life, right?
I didn't want this blog to be about pissing and moaning. It was meant to be a place where I could express my spiritual side, so this is the last that I will post about this BS so as not to taint it further. A distraction per se from the reality of my life :)
At least I got 2 hours straight sleep before waking up due to coughing fits, so I must be getting better! :)
New neighbours moving in to one of the apartments next door. They're really loud moving in and they don't look...healthy...if you know what I mean? But, we'll see. So far it's only a bed from a trailer on the back of a beat up blue and black van. Can't judge a book by it's cover, right?
So, with regards to the previous post, I'm a hater not a lover, I ahve been going through a period of time where I hate just about everything and anything. It's ironic since we're getting more help at work (they've hired on more leads and another Supervisor), the work is expanding (we're renovating the upstairs of the building and hoping to move upstairs by the end of March), I got a raise (which simply puts me in another tax bracket - I don't see any more money) and in most people's eyes all is good and yet, I find I hate everything...I hate my job, I hate the building, I hate the fact that we're renovating (lots of noise and interruptions to our current calls and customers) I hate the fact that while I'm making more money than I ever have, I'm farther behind in the money department, and I have no idea why since the bills aren't any different than before! I hate the weather, I hate the shovelling, I hate this town, I hate my body, I hate my weight, I hate my car (especially in the snow). It feels like basically the only thing that I don't seem to hate right now is my husband (which is a good thing!)
I'd love to get away for a trip, but I've got committments that I can't get out of (playing for a student for her university music auditions) and no money, no ability to get any money either. It's my own fault (didn't pay the taxman on time, so payments throughout the year kind of drag you down) so I have no one to blame for my misery other than myself, but it just seems that I will never see lighter time, fun times or happy times again. I don't feel like I can spend money on anything more than the necessaities and movies or travel is way too much of a luxury to even contemplate, but I am afraid that if this continues for what it appears it will continu for (a significant amount of time - probably more than another year) I will go insane. Ah well. That's life, right?
I didn't want this blog to be about pissing and moaning. It was meant to be a place where I could express my spiritual side, so this is the last that I will post about this BS so as not to taint it further. A distraction per se from the reality of my life :)
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Hard way to get time off work
So, being sick and full of infectino is a hard way to get time off work. :( I have to say this past week has been a bit rough. Had a shit end to a party on Saturday night past, which basically started off the new shit week. I found my throat to be a bit raw on Sunday, but thought it was because I had been up too late. As the day progressed, the throat got worse and a headache came into play. By teh time I got ready for bed, I coudln't get warm.
Woke up Monday and had the headache and the soare throat, but it wasn't too bad. Got to work and realized that I was in a complete daze...brain too thick to think straight and that there were at least 3 others with teh same symptoms. BOOOO!!! (Yes, all were at the same party Sat. night).
Tuesday, I went to work with a burning hot marble stuck in my throat, but the headache was gone. Little did I know thatthe fever however wasn't. :(
So, Tuesday night at 3:20am I woke up and could barely swallow. Seriously considered going to the ER in the dead of night, but realized that they woudln't get me in before morning anyway, so just tried to medicate myself. Little did I know that when I tried to spray chloaseptic spray on the throat to numb it, it only made it burn worse! Same as cough drops...so, water only from then on out. Dozed on and off until around 7am and I decided I'd call in sick. It was then that I realized I had to voice.
So, off to St. Joe's I go - 9:15am and there already was a line up 10 deep! :( Anyhoos, got in, got seen, got told I'm one big infectious mess - ear infection, throat and pharnyx infections. Got 10 days of penicillan and told to eat little bits of ice cream, popsicles, cold jello or apple sauce, chicken noodle soup, rice and toast and constantly sip water. Put a cold compress (Facecloth) on the throat and that's the best they could do. Totally contagious, so keep the surgical mask they gave me in triage for going out in public. *yeah right!*
BOOOOO.
Still haven't slept (I actually tried to sleep with the mask on last night so Van woudln't catch anything by my coughing), don't think the meds have kicked in ('cuase I feel worse today) and the coughing has started with a vengeance which I haven't had up until now.
Now that I have finally changed over to the new blogger, I'll try to update more often.
PS: I will address the comment tomorrow. Too tired right now...going back to the couch. BOOO.
PPS: At least Distraction is on at 11pm tonight! YAAY!
Woke up Monday and had the headache and the soare throat, but it wasn't too bad. Got to work and realized that I was in a complete daze...brain too thick to think straight and that there were at least 3 others with teh same symptoms. BOOOO!!! (Yes, all were at the same party Sat. night).
Tuesday, I went to work with a burning hot marble stuck in my throat, but the headache was gone. Little did I know thatthe fever however wasn't. :(
So, Tuesday night at 3:20am I woke up and could barely swallow. Seriously considered going to the ER in the dead of night, but realized that they woudln't get me in before morning anyway, so just tried to medicate myself. Little did I know that when I tried to spray chloaseptic spray on the throat to numb it, it only made it burn worse! Same as cough drops...so, water only from then on out. Dozed on and off until around 7am and I decided I'd call in sick. It was then that I realized I had to voice.
So, off to St. Joe's I go - 9:15am and there already was a line up 10 deep! :( Anyhoos, got in, got seen, got told I'm one big infectious mess - ear infection, throat and pharnyx infections. Got 10 days of penicillan and told to eat little bits of ice cream, popsicles, cold jello or apple sauce, chicken noodle soup, rice and toast and constantly sip water. Put a cold compress (Facecloth) on the throat and that's the best they could do. Totally contagious, so keep the surgical mask they gave me in triage for going out in public. *yeah right!*
BOOOOO.
Still haven't slept (I actually tried to sleep with the mask on last night so Van woudln't catch anything by my coughing), don't think the meds have kicked in ('cuase I feel worse today) and the coughing has started with a vengeance which I haven't had up until now.
Now that I have finally changed over to the new blogger, I'll try to update more often.
PS: I will address the comment tomorrow. Too tired right now...going back to the couch. BOOO.
PPS: At least Distraction is on at 11pm tonight! YAAY!
Friday, January 19, 2007
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
sick sucks
Man, I have had a wicked 24 hours! I got a flu shot, but I've had it coming out boh ends! I know I brought it on myself with not eating since breakfast on Monday and then eating heavy too fast at 5:30, but sheesh! My head still isn't settled and tonight I still have the runs. Here's hoping that tomorrow will get me back on track, because I can't keep going like this - it's too tiring! No food = No energy :(
Saturday, January 06, 2007
busy week
So, even though this past week was the shortest week on record, it felt like the longest, busiest week ever!
Even on our "days off", we haven't had much time "off" because I was in the mood to get the house back to rights, so we've been working like little buggers to get things taken down, packed away and put back up again.
We've moved a few things around and I'm liking where things are sitting ight now and there is even some room to move! :)
Loving the new stereo/docking port and were able to bring back out all the CD's from the spare room in back since we now have a working stereo again! YAAAY!!
So, watched Highlander last night for the first time. It was a pretty good movie overall. Even though it was made in 1985, it had a lot of things that were very cool to see again - like the fabulous freebirds - when they were actually fabulous! hehehe
Michael Hayes and Jimmy Jam really never changed much while they were still working the road. Only after did they go to pot. But, funny none the less to start that movie off with for me.
Well, watching Poker, typing a blog and trying to get rid of this headache I have had for literally a week straight. Not going so well, but it's pretty much been at bay for most of the day today - YAA! It got so bad overnight last night that I had horrid nightmares :(
Well, work and festival are heating up so I may or may not be on much in the next little while. No more internet access at work, so it'll depend on how I feel when I get home. :)
Take it cool folksies!
Even on our "days off", we haven't had much time "off" because I was in the mood to get the house back to rights, so we've been working like little buggers to get things taken down, packed away and put back up again.
We've moved a few things around and I'm liking where things are sitting ight now and there is even some room to move! :)
Loving the new stereo/docking port and were able to bring back out all the CD's from the spare room in back since we now have a working stereo again! YAAAY!!
So, watched Highlander last night for the first time. It was a pretty good movie overall. Even though it was made in 1985, it had a lot of things that were very cool to see again - like the fabulous freebirds - when they were actually fabulous! hehehe
Michael Hayes and Jimmy Jam really never changed much while they were still working the road. Only after did they go to pot. But, funny none the less to start that movie off with for me.
Well, watching Poker, typing a blog and trying to get rid of this headache I have had for literally a week straight. Not going so well, but it's pretty much been at bay for most of the day today - YAA! It got so bad overnight last night that I had horrid nightmares :(
Well, work and festival are heating up so I may or may not be on much in the next little while. No more internet access at work, so it'll depend on how I feel when I get home. :)
Take it cool folksies!
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Full Moon/Wolf Moon
I see tonight is a full moon. I purchased for the first time in 10 years a Llewellyn's Witches' Datebook for 2007. I am going to use it as my "home journal". anyhoos, It tells me that tomorrow morning at 8:57am eastern is actually when the moon turns Full. Moot point. Looks full enough to me!
This Full Moon is very cool for me and in the terms of cool too :) According to this book, tonight's full moon is the "Cold Moon", also known as the "Wolf Moon". It states:
"On the year's first Full Moon, also called the Wolf Moon, take time to reflect on the magic and medicine of the wold. A popular animal ally with Witches and magic users, the wld is a pathfinder, leader and teacher (I never used the Wolf in the Witch or magical sense, but I took the Wolf medicine of the Native American teaching of it being the totem for teachers and leaders). The wolf has an incredible sense of family, but also independence. The Wolf encourages us to share our knowledge. Whether sharing your knowledge with circle or coven mates or teaching a formal class, calling on the wolf will give you the strength to walk your individual magical path and help others find theirs."
I'm teaching training classes all day tomorrow and Thursday. Good days to be influenced by the Wolf Moon!
This Full Moon is very cool for me and in the terms of cool too :) According to this book, tonight's full moon is the "Cold Moon", also known as the "Wolf Moon". It states:
"On the year's first Full Moon, also called the Wolf Moon, take time to reflect on the magic and medicine of the wold. A popular animal ally with Witches and magic users, the wld is a pathfinder, leader and teacher (I never used the Wolf in the Witch or magical sense, but I took the Wolf medicine of the Native American teaching of it being the totem for teachers and leaders). The wolf has an incredible sense of family, but also independence. The Wolf encourages us to share our knowledge. Whether sharing your knowledge with circle or coven mates or teaching a formal class, calling on the wolf will give you the strength to walk your individual magical path and help others find theirs."
I'm teaching training classes all day tomorrow and Thursday. Good days to be influenced by the Wolf Moon!
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